In the past two years, I’ve sat across from more than a hundred developers, owners, and companies. Along the way, I’ve developed a pretty sharp radar for a certain type of seller – the one who simply isn’t ready to make a deal.
Why It Matters
The problem with an unready seller isn’t just the wasted time – though there’s plenty of that. It’s the opportunity cost.
- Another meeting, another “new idea,” another draft term sheet.
- More consultants, attorneys, and due diligence burned on a deal that was never really alive.
- And worst of all: your attention gets pulled away from the deals that are ready.
It’s human nature to chase the elusive. Sometimes we want to crack the unsolvable puzzle just to prove we can. But in a market full of alternatives, spending months trying to “fix” a seller who isn’t ready is the worst allocation of your most valuable resource: time.
A year ago, I caught myself deep into exactly this trap. I had poured hours, energy, and real money into a deal where the red flags were waving from day one. I ignored them, convinced I could will it into existence. In hindsight? Waste of effort.
How to Recognize an Unready Seller
The good news: you can learn to spot the signs early. If several of these behaviors start showing up, it’s a strong signal the seller isn’t ready for prime time.
- Constantly rescheduling. Meetings get pushed again and again.
- Asking for off-market pricing or unrealistic terms. They’re anchored to fantasy, not comps.
- Walking back agreements. Things you thought were settled get reopened.
- Focusing on losses, not gains. They tell you what they’re “giving up” instead of what they’ll achieve with the deal.
- Lots of meetings, no real progress. The calendar fills up, but nothing moves forward.
- Nitpicking standard clauses. Even boilerplate legal terms become battlefields.
- Treating the asset like a child. They speak about the property or company as if it’s their baby – not a financial asset.
- Cycling through advisors. They replace brokers, lawyers, and consultants constantly, convinced no one “gets it.”
If you’ve been in the game long enough, these symptoms are all too familiar.
The Only Strategy That Works
So what should you do when you recognize you’re dealing with an unready seller?
There’s really only one play: cut it off early.
Don’t sink deeper hoping they’ll come around. Don’t launch into lectures about market reality. Don’t try to wear them down into maturity.
Instead:
- Identify the lack of readiness. Trust your gut when the signals stack up.
- Detach quickly. Politely explain that you’re focused on transactions that are more actionable.
- Stay professional. No drama, no scolding, no “I told you so.” Just clean disengagement.
Counterintuitively, your disengagement might actually rattle them. When they realize serious buyers aren’t willing to indulge the fantasy, some sellers wake up. And sometimes, that’s the moment when they finally become deal-ready.
But even if they don’t, you’ve already won – because you’ve reclaimed your most precious resource: time.
Why This Discipline Is Hard
Walking away isn’t easy. Deal people are wired to hunt, to problem-solve, to close. When you spot resistance, the instinct is to lean in harder.
But think of it this way: you wouldn’t keep bidding on a property at twice market value just because you “like” the building. Why keep pushing with a seller who’s showing you they’re not serious?
The most disciplined investors and acquirers are the ones who know when not to play.
Final Thought
Not every seller is ready, and that’s okay. But you don’t have to waste your career trying to drag them across the finish line.
Learn to spot the signs, detach without drama, and reinvest your energy where it counts – with sellers who are ready to transact.
In real estate, as in life, maturity matters. Deals happen when both sides are aligned. Until then, don’t confuse activity with progress.
👉 For more straight talk on real estate and finance – based on real deals, not theory – hit subscribe to Getting Real with Peleg.
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